I'm a winner!

Okay, let me catch my breath just a second here.

They say that if you believe strongly enough in something, good things will come from it.

Maybe that adage doesn't always come true. But it just did for me.

"Lost in the Ivy" just was named winner of the Fresh Voices 2006 Book Award in the Mystery/Suspense/Thriller category.

 Finally, I'm at a loss for words.

Update on Tuesday, January 24, 2006 at 05:49AM by Randy Richardson

What are the "Fresh Voices" awards? Sponsored by the Writer's Marketing Association, the "Fresh Voices" awards are open to all unpublished writers and print-on-demand and small press authors. Basically they're awards designed to give the little guys a chance.

Eighties Enough

The words potty training typically sound off alarm bells in the ears of parents.

But not mine.

What I hear is the sound of blowing steam, followed by a train whistle and then a voice calling out “Aaaaahhhll aboard.”

Music starts playing slowly in the background and slowly builds into one of the funkiest grooves you’ve ever heard.

Soon my shoulders are bopping up and down and my head is bobbing. Suddenly R&B great Charlie Wilson belts out:

Everybody all aboard.

Anybody want to take this ride?

Anybody want to ride?

All it takes is a nickel or dime.

Be sure to get your ticket.

Hurry don’t you miss it.

Everybody’s got to stand in line

To be sure that you will be right on time.

Everybody, all aboard.

Everybody, all aboard.

Baby, don’t you miss that train.

Don’t miss the party train.

The song is “Party Train,” a classic eighties funk groove from The Gap Band. Whenever talk turns to potty training, it plays in my head. And when it’s just me, The Toddler and the potty, I let it spill out, taking a bit of artistic license with the lyrics, singing Baby, don’t you miss that train. Don’t miss the potty train.

Okay, so I'm not Bob Dylan.

The Toddler rolls his eyes, as if he’s telling Daddy, “Don’t you dare sing that in front of my friends.”

Lately it seems quarters are dropping regularly into the jukebox of eighties songs that is my head. Like when I heard that The Toddler’s hair stylist is named Jenny and Tommy Tutone’s “867-5309/Jenny” popped up.

You probably know the lyrics but if you don’t they go like this:

Jenny, I got your number,

I need to make you mine.

Jenny, don't change your number,

 8-6-7-5-3-0-9 (8-6-7-5-3-0-9)

8-6-7-5-3-0-9 (8-6-7-5-3-0-9)

I sang, “Jenny, I want a haircut” and The Toddler joined in, giggling like when he first discovered pancake holes.

Recently we booked a Disney cruise and the song that’s played in my head since was Lakeside’s “Fantastic Voyage.” Now I know that while other parents on the cruise will be hearing “It’s a Small World (After All),” “When You Wish Upon a Star” and “Under the Sea,” till their blue in the face (and not due to seasickness), I’ll be tuned into Come along and ride on a fantastic voyage.

One day all of this will be “Set Adrift on a Memory Bliss,” which is of course the title of P.M. Dawn’s 1991 hit that sampled Spandau Ballet’s new wave classic “True” (1983).

But I choose to live for today. And to follow the immortal wisdom preached by another eighties band, Wang Chung: “Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.”

Lost on Brokeback Mountain?

I haven't seen “Brokeback Mountain” and doubt I ever will. Sorry, I’m just not a fan of cowboy movies.

What, you thought I that I wouldn't see it because it's a gay cowboy movie?

I’ll admit that the image of kissing cowboys makes me squirm a little, but I’ve never been one to avoid a movie just because it makes me a bit uncomfortable.

I’m not quite sure what all the fuss is about anyways. Does it really come as a surprise that cowboys could be gay?

The subject of “Brokeback Mountain” came up in a half-hour radio interview I did on Monday on KXLE 95.3 FM, a station in central Washington that boasts it has 50,000 watts of country power.

This was one of those questions that came right out of the glove of Matt Murton, slated to play left field for the Chicago Cubs this year.

The interviewer, a newsman not a DJ, tiptoed around the question. He referred to “Brokeback Mountain” not by its title but as the much-talked about, Oscar-touted western in theatres now. I was pretty sure he wasn’t talking about “Cheaper by the Dozen 2.”

He was curious if “Lost in the Ivy,” the book I authored and the reason I was on his program, was in any way influenced by “Brokeback Mountain.”

Of course the release of “Lost in the Ivy” came months before the “Brokeback Mountain” hit the big screen, and I’m pretty sure the interviewer was aware of that. But it was his way of delicately dancing around a sensitive topic.

“Brokeback Mountain” deals with subject matter that not too long ago was considered taboo and in some ways still is. How else do you explain all the parodies and jokes that have evolved out of a serious film? I hear them every day on Jonathan Brandmeier’s radio show on WLUP FM 97.9. Even though I’ve never seen the film, I feel like I have. The line from the movie “I wish I knew how to quit you” plays in my head like a broken record.

It’s no big secret that a gay character plays a key role in my book. In some ways the book was inspired by the dichotomy that I saw between two Chicago neighborhoods.

Back in the mid-1990s I was living in a studio apartment located on the border of two very different neighborhoods living somewhat uncomfortably next to each other. On one side there was Wrigleyville and all the testosterone-fueled sports bars. On the other was Boys Town, Chicago’s main gay district. At the time I was living there, there had been a spate of gay-bashing incidents. All of that served as a backdrop for the story that would eventually unfold into “Lost in the Ivy.”

Back in the late 1990s, Annie Proulx published a short story which few people had heard of until this year. Its title: “Brokeback Mountain.” It was about a time and a place that stuck with her.

Maybe someday that piece of my life that stuck with me all these years will be discovered. That’s a dream I’d never want to quit.

Update on Saturday, February 11, 2006 at 08:58PM by Randy Richardson

I seem to get a lot of hits on my blog from wayward surfers searching for "Brokeback" parodies. Thanks to the Fresno Bee's Beehive blog, you don't have to look any further. They've compiled a comprehensive list of online "Brokeback" parodies, for those that "just can't get enough" of them.

A short story for you

Today I take off my self-promotion cap so that I can talk about another's work.

Typically I turn away from literature with the tag chick lit. Why, I guess because I'm not a chick and dudes don't read chick lit. Kind of like eating quiche.

But a couple months ago Bethany Hiitola, a member of my writers' group and creator of the Mommy Writer Blog, bravely posted a short story she'd written titled "Postpartum Euphoria" for anyone who wanted to read it.

Call be a sucker but I'll pick up almost anything if it's for free. So I downloaded her story.

I took it to bed with me that same night and read it in one sitting. The next day I composed an e-mail telling her how much I liked her story. But I also pointed out to her a few typos and offered to give it a more thorough edit.

It turns out that Bethany is also one who grabs anything that's offered for free. She took me up on my offer.

So began our relationship by e-mail in which I became Bethany's editor/mentor/coach/cheerleader and she made me feel good by writing these gushing thank-yous in return. This lasted for several weeks and consumed a lot more time than I think either of us foresaw. But, in the end, it, I think, was all worthwhile.

I hope you'll think it was worth the effort, too. Read "Postpartum Euphoria" and find out for yourself. You'll see my name right next to "special thanks" (okay, so I didn't completely take off that self-promotion cap).

It won't cost you a thing. And you might just find, like I did, that sometimes the best things in life are free. 

LOST gets its first thumbs down

"Lost in the Ivy by Randy Richardson is a captivating story, well written and articulate."

So begins Alan Paul Curtis' review of my book on his Who Dunnit Web site.

Reads like a review that any author would dream of. But you know what's coming, don't you? Of course you do, since I tipped you off with the title of this blog entry.

You smell the big BUT coming, right? Here it is: "But it has one glaring fault -- the plot has huge holes in it."

I've said all along that bad reviews would almost certainly come. Book reviewing is, by definition, a subjective business. And everyone's tastes are different. We all don't share the same cup of tea.

Still, I'd been riding a pretty strong wave of approval for my book (see the Home Page for a sampling of the reviews)  before this review caused me to wipe out. Even though you know that when you put yourself out there not everyone's going to like what you do, I must confess that the ego took a couple of lumps when I read Mr. Curtis' review.

I could take the high road and not comment at all on his criticisms but I find that my inner compass just won't let me follow that path.  

First, he's right. The judge who's introduced at the opening is nothing but a big red herring. I suppose I could have avoided that problem and put the courtroom escape scene in the middle of the story, which is where it actually takes place, rather than in a prologue. But I wanted action to start the story, so I put the courtroom escape front and center. In hindsight, I'm not sure if I would have made that same choice today. I fought an internal battle with myself over using a linear versus non-linear plot line and even sought external advice. The votes from others who'd read the story were divided, so I became the tie-breaker. Perhaps I made the wrong choice. You see, I'm still split myself. It's a tough call, as are most choices you make in constructing a novel.

Second, he's only partially correct about flimsy evidence. The fact is, we never learn what evidence the cops have against the protagonist because the case never gets to trial. He flees the courtroom before there's even a bond hearing. Not that flimsy evidence has ever slowed Chicago cops. Heck, men have gone to death row on flimsy evidence. And the reviewer doesn't know much about the criminal courts if he thinks that murder defendants can get out on bail easily. The only murder defendants that can get out on bail are VERY rich ones. The protagonist in my book could barely pay his own rent. How could he possibly raise funds to make bail? I spent years covering the criminal courts and can't remember a single murder case that I covered in which the accused was able to raise bond. Judges, for obvious reasons, are reluctant to just let an accused killer walk out of jail.

The reviewer only alludes to other plot holes in the story. There may very well be some, but I don't think that they amount to a Grand Canyon as a reader might suspect from the way he portrays them.

I could be wrong but what I think the reviewer is getting at is that Lost in the Ivy is not a traditional mystery and the hard-core mystery enthusiasts who are his primary readers may not find it to their tastes. I don't disagree with that. One of the problems I had selling the manuscript was that it didn't "fit" what most publishers are looking for. But it's the story I wanted to tell and I don't think I'd change it -- except for the possibility of changing it to a linear plot. See, I'm still having that inner battle with myself.

Of course you can always put a positive spin on a bad review. You see it done all the time in movie ads. Like when a critic writes that "Deuce Bigelow: European Gigolo" is a perfect example of all that can go wrong with a movie and his sentence is pared down to one word in the ad: "Perfect".

Likewise I can just pretend that Mr. Curtis' review didn't go past that first sentence.