Does size matter?
Monday, November 14, 2005 at 12:09PM My stature as an author reached a new low this past weekend.
By stature I do not mean the level or status that I’ve achieved as a writer. In that sense I realize I’ve achieved very little. Yes, I’ve written a book and that is a rather considerable accomplishment. But as an author I’m basically nobody. Certainly there aren’t lines of people waiting for me when I show up at book signings.
What I’m referring to instead is actual height, as in a measurement of one’s verticality.
At 5 feet 9 inches, I’ve never considered myself to be tall. But I’ve also never thought of myself as short, either. I’ve always held the belief that I was, well, average. And indeed that’s exactly what I am when you compare my height to other adult males in the United States.
I’ve written before on the lessons I’ve learned on my mini-book tour. On Saturday, I learned another: when it comes to chairs, size does matter.
At a book signing, you’re on public display. And you’re even more in the spotlight when you do readings. In some ways you become a performer. So the last thing you want to do is appear small on the stage. But that’s exactly how I looked sitting next to author John Knoerle.
I’ve written about Knoerle before. He has a background in stand-up comedy and has a theatrical voice which makes him, unlike most authors, a natural for readings. What I didn’t mention before is that he’s also vertically blessed. He has a definite presence when you’re around him.
When I first appeared with Knoerle a few weeks back, the height differences didn’t seem quite so noticeable. But on Saturday, when I made an ill-fated decision to place my rear in a rocking chair that sat much lower to the ground than the stationary chair that Knoerle took, our height differences became magnified. I sensed that I’d been shrunk by the chair as I sat there but I didn’t realize just how small I became until I saw the pictures taken by my wife. Think of a male version of Lily Tomlin’s Edith Ann.
So does size matter when it comes to selling books? Apparently not. I nearly sold out on Saturday. Call it chairity, perhaps.
Many thanks to the friendly people at The Bookstore. Stop by there and give them some business. You might even find a rare signed copy of Lost in the Ivy amid the stacks. I left a couple of them there.
And special thanks to those who came out to see me. It was great seeing some friendly faces in the audience, both family and friends. Not one of them even made fun of me for becoming a human Shrinky Dink.
Next up: I’ll be one of about 30 authors at the Cultural Center at Randolph and Michigan in Chicago on Saturday from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. for the Illinois Woman’s Press Association (IWPA) Book Fair. (Note that my name is the only one that's not in bold. Not that I'm developing a Napoleonic complex or anything.)
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